Summer is time for having fun with your family, right? "Fun?" We'd like to have more fun together but our family is just too busy. We don't have a minute to spare. Fun just isn't practical right now."
Perhaps that was your reaction when someone (maybe your own children) suggested that your family do something "fun" together. Maybe other things--including church activities--seem more important. And wouldn't this attempt at family fun eat up even more of your limited time?
Many busy parents have a hard time taking family fun seriously.But it IS serious business. It provides one small bit of the glue that binds families together and helps sustain them through the difficult times of life. Family fun is recreation in the best sense of the word: a time of family "re-creation".
MAKE A FAMILY MEMORY
We started our family fun experiences when our children were young. We made it a family tradition to go camping together every Memorial and Labor day weekend. We had a lot of fun fishing, cooking out, and just "getting away" together. Since my idea of camping does not include sleeping on the ground, we used an old tent camper that we pulled behind our car.
Inevitably, the old camper died one spring. The metal frame that supported the tent would no longer open. The rust had finally won! We didn't want to give up our fun family camping tradition so I borrowed a tent from a friend and we went camping anyway.
It rained the entire first night and the borrowed tent leaked generously. You can imagine what happened. We all woke up Saturday morning lying in the pool of water that had collected in our tent during the night. The rain continued the next day and by late Saturday afternoon, we gave up and went home.
That was the first and last time we went tent camping together. We still laugh about that fateful trip whenever we think about camping. That weekend wasn't fun at the time but it has certainly become quite a family memory! In fact, that's one of the benefits of having fun as a family--it builds special family memories.
MODEL A BALANCED LIFESTYLE
My wife and I always thought we understood the value of family fun. The problem was finding the time and money for it.
But over the years we've learned some ways to make family fun happen--even for busy families--and how to have family fun without spending a lot of money. But even when family fun does cost time and money, I'm convinced that fun activities are an essential part of a healthy, balanced family life. Helping your children develop healthy habits of re-creation is importan t to their future spiritual, emotional and physical health. Our society often sends an opposite message so it's important to show your chidlren that life is more than just work. Take time to model for them a lifestyle that balances healthy amounts of both work and play. Having fun together also allows you to enjoy and deepen relationships with those you love.
PLAN AHEAD
Somewhere along the way, I found that the important things in life rarely "just happen". Someone usually makes them happen. So if enjoying each other and having fun together is important to you, you'll want to make it a priority--just like family worship and family chores. Our family plans our fun, just as we do other priority activities.
Each year in the spring, the local school district sends home the school calendar for the coming year. As soon as it comes, I mark in my personal calendar those weekdays and long weekends when my children won't be in school. This helps me to plan for the occasional special family fun activities or weekend getaways that require more time and advance planning.
After I've blocked out those special days, I'm more easily protected from infringements on that time. If a potential conflict comes up , I can truthfuly say "I already have a committment that day". Some parents I know set aside every Saturday morning or one evening each week as a regular family fun time, also.
SELECT SOMETHING EVERYONE ENJOYS
A family fun activity can also be a service activity, as long as everyone enjoys it. Perhaps your family would enjoy serving a meal at the city mission (as our family does) or visiting a local nursing home or children's hospital. Maybe you'd all enjoy working with wood (building or rehabilitatIng simple furniture for the needy) or reading a novel together (C.S. Lewis' CHRONICLES OF NARNIA is a great series to begin with).
Finding a family activity that interests all of you may be a challenge, but it's not impossible! The activity you choose will probably be short in terms of time committment, suited to your children's ages and interests. Often it may be as simple as family gardening or a "fix up" project. Everyone can experience the inportance (and, not incidentally, the joy) of serving others within the family, also. That's a valuable lesson to carry over into life in God's family, the church.
There's no reason that family fun time can't be a time to share God's love, also. A number o f times, we've included one of my son's friends in family fun trips. One son even brought a friend along on a family vacation. It's a great opportunity for your children to include their friends in a situation where they can experience a loving family enjoying each other and sharing God's love with each other. The same goes for inviting another family to join you in a fun time. Sharing a non-threatening, fun activity creates a great atmosphere in which to naturally share God's love.
RESERVE TIME FOR YOU, TOO
Parents need fun together, too. My wife and I set aside most Friday nights to rent a movie to watch together. Even if you can't schedule your fun time so regularly, you can make it your goal to do at least one enjoyable activity together each week. We like to walk together--both for enjoyment and for exercise, too. Other itmes, our fun is to go out for ice cream, go window shopping or just sit together and listen to quiet music. When you make an investment of time to build your relationship, the investment will pay great dividends for your family as a whole.
Over the years, we've learned a lot from our fun times together as a family. Our children and their friends learned that people of faith laugh and enjoy life with good reason. They've seen how a healthy, balanced Christian lifestyle is lived out. And meanwhile, we've all had a lot of fun and enjoyed each other tremendously.
Playing together, like praying together, is one more way to strengthen and bind your family together.For us, and for all families, fun really is serious business!
(c) Richard Patterson, Jr.
